Primitive Archer
Main Discussion Area => Around the Campfire => Topic started by: El Destructo on September 10, 2010, 01:48:53 pm
-
Dear Diary,
Just moved to Texas from Upper Michigan ! Now this is a state that knows how to
live!!
Beautiful sunny days and warm balmy evenings. What a place!
It is beautiful. I've finally found my home. I love it here.
June 14th:
Really heating up. Got to 100 today. Not a problem. Live in an
air-conditioned home, drive an air-conditioned car.
What a pleasure to see the sun everyday like this. I'm
turning into a sun worshipper.
June 30th:
Had the backyard landscaped with western plants today. Lots
of cactus and rocks. What a breeze to maintain. No more mowing
the lawn for me.
Another scorcher today, but I love it here.
July 10th:
The temperature hasn't been below 100 all week. How do
people get used to this kind of heat?
At least, it's kind of windy though. But getting used to the
heat is taking longer than I expected.
July 15th:
Fell asleep by the community pool. (Got 2nd degree burns
over 60% of my body). Missed 3 days of work. What a dumb-assed thing to do.
I learned my lesson though. Got to respect the ol' sun in a
climate like this.
July 20th:
I missed Lomita (my cat) sneaking into the car when I left
this morning. By the time I got to the hot car at noon, Lomita
had died and swollen up to the size of a shopping bag, then
popped like a water balloon.
I learned my lesson though. No more pets in this heat.
Good ol' Mr. Sun strikes again.
July 25th:
The friggin wind sucks. It feels like a giant blow dryer!!
And it's hot as hell. The home air-conditioner is on the
fritz and the AC repairman charged $200 just to drive by and tell
me he needed to order parts.
July 30th:
Been sleeping outside on the patio for 3 nights now,
$225,000 house and I can't even go inside.. Lomita is the lucky one.
Why did I ever come here?
Aug. 4th:
It's 115 degrees. Finally got the air-conditioner fixed today.
It cost $1000 and gets the temperature down to 85 degrees inside. I hate
this stupid state.
Aug. 8th:
If another wise ass cracks, 'Hot enough for you today?' I'm
going to strangle him. Damn heat. By the time I get to work,
the radiator is boiling over, my clothes are soaking wet, and I
smell like baked cat!!
Aug. 9th:
Tried to run some errands after work. Wore shorts, and when I
sat on the seats in the car, my ass caught fire.
My skin melted to the seat. I lost 2 layers of flesh and all
the hair on the back of my legs. . . Now my car smells
like burnt hair, fried ass, and baked cat.
Aug 10th:
I'm convinced now that the weather report is a damn recording. Hot
and sunny.
Hot and sunny. Hot and sunny. It's been too hot to do Shit
for 2 damn months and the weatherman says it might really warm up
next week.
Doesn't it ever rain in this damn state? Water rationing
will be next, so my $1700 worth of cactus will just dry up and blow over.
Even the cactus can't live in this damn heat.
Aug. 14th:
Welcome to HELL! Temperature got to 125 today. Cactus are dead.
Forgot to crack the window and blew the damn windshield out
of the car. The installer came to fix it and guess what he
asked me??? "Hot enough for you today?"
My WIfe had to spend $1,500 to bail me out of jail.
Freaking Texas .
What kind of a sick demented idiot would want to live here??
Will write later to let you know how the trial goes.
-
Sept 1st:
Went to visit the UP today, got 12 inches of snow. Car got stuck in a snow drift. $300 for a wrecker to pull it out, another $400 to replace the front drive train where the ice ripped it out. Oh by the way. I had to walk to a pay phone because my cell battery was dead. Got frost bite on my toes, $5000 at the emergency room. I wont miss those toes.......... much. Slipped on the ice on my way out of the emergency room. Another $400 for the broken arm.
Cant wait to get back to Texas. >:D
-
I can't read any more of this, I'm at work and I'm running out of excuses why I keep laughing out loud. Not supposed to be any fun here >:( but this stuff is toooooo rich :D
Actually, Mike's diary post says a lot of the same stuff I was saying here in Indiana this summer, except I've lived here all my life and didn't move here from somewhere else. We didn't get to 125 but our humidity is what really kills ya. You can sweat justw alking outside at 90 here as bad as you could at 105 in Texas.
CP
-
Hysterically funny! The poor cat, but man, I couldn't help but laugh!
Sometimes I feel the same living here in FL but, it's not that hot. Just dripping wet humid!
Thanks for the laugh.
-
Oh man that was so frickin funny I couldnt stand it.
thanks for the great laugh... I needed one.
Good way to end the week.
later
wade
-
awww, texas aint that bad! been here for all 28 years of my life. cars do get hot though. they are good for hot boxes to dry things out quickly.
-
At least when it get's that hot in Florida they go back to the UP. We only have to wait till the next year to hear them complain about how cold and miserable it was when they left the UP. Some people are never happy.
But that was funny, Mike.
-
that sucks
-
oh shit that was funny Mike
im still wiping tears away
-
Do a YouTube search for "Brian Burns Welcome To Texas" Pretty funny song but as a native Texan also true.
-
Very funny reading that! People's comments to it are just as good :D hehe
Just one thing... what's the UP?
-
Just one thing... what's the UP?
thats blasphemy :o :o
nah, just joshing ya
the UP is the Upper Peninsula of Michigan
-
Now ....Now Timmy O Boy....Hatch is from Ireland now....he don't know about the difference b-tween Da Yoopers and Da Trolls dat live b-low Da Mighty Mac...dats da biggest suspension Bridge in da USA...not ta be confused wit da Golden Gate Bridge in San Francisco...dat gets all da fame!! Da Folks in da UP are very proud of der Heritage...but are a good kind hearted bunch to dontchano....eh!
-
hatch,my apologies
didnt realize you werent from the states here ;)
Mike is right aboot that bridge too.one huge ass TOTAL SUSPENSION BRIDGE
very cool
-
All this time I thought that was part of Canada. >:D
-
Mike ,I know it's been hot in the panhandle,but here in east Texas,I have not been able to tiller a whitewood bow all summer,the humidity rarely gets less than 70%,and thats on those 105 degree days. I did manage one osage bow that's gettin' the tru-oil right now.Just lettin' you know,ya'll are;nt alone buddy.By the way,I liked your diary. ;D God Bless
-
All this time I thought that was part of Canada. >:D
You wantin ta Feud der Cracker........... >:(...Dem shor soundin like Fightin Word der......... >:D
Pete...ya ...you can keep your Humidity....I can barely handle the 120 degree days with 25-40%....let alone 70-80%
-
Keep yer shorts on there Mike I knew better just razzin ya a little. Ron
-
I am glad...cause I didn't want to get in my Shelby..and drive all the way to Georgia...just to have you Whoop My Ass.......... ;D
-
Bows, flints, primitive lodgings and now geography... this site is great! I now have a better understanding of the term "Yooper" so will be able to chuckle away when you guys trade "insults" ;) hehehe
It's raining here with a strong, blustery wind. Great weather for an open fire :D none of your "105-125°" here...
-
I am glad...cause I didn't want to get in my Shelby..and drive all the way to Georgia...just to have you Whoop My Ass.......... ;D
Well first I'd try to be diplomatic by offerin ya a beer and talkin about it. If that didn't work I'd have to call Bubba to take care of my light work.Ron
-
LMAO....
-
You forgot the entry for August 15th:
No one in Texas knows what lutefisk is. Asked local grocery store aboot getting lutefisk. Guy says he don't sell musical instruments there. And says what's wrong with a guitar anyway? Explained to the guy what lutefisk is, then. Poor guy threw up, dontchyaknow.
-
Cute...but they don't even know what a Pasty is...Let alone a Cudaghy....Safron Bun...Potato Sausage...Smelt...Smoked Chubs...Potato Soup...hell they never heard of most of what I grew up on....but you can keep the Lutefisk...I can do without the Lye Soaked Fish thats for sure!!
-
Heck, I don't even know what those things are. I saw smelts here at the store once, though. They sell them as bait to people going up to Lake Powell.
-
now thats funny! we used to catch them by the 55 gallon barrels when they were Spawning...they come out of Lake Superior to Spawn in the Rivers and Streams...and they come in such numbers...that when standing in the Water...You can feel them pounding into your Legs...just swish your Smelting Net in the Water...and you would come up with 3-5 pounds of the little Sucker....a case or two of Beer was a Necessity...along with an 8 track tape of Credence Clearwater Revival playing in the Pickup on the Quadraphonic 8 Track Tape Deck...and then it takes the rest of the Night and another case or two to clean all the little Suckers....or you can be tough like the Finns back Home...and just smoke em like a Sardine...and eat em all...... :P
-
Mike that talk of smelt brings back soe fond memories
my grandpa would come home withmilk cans filled with them
the entire back of his pick up truk would be filled with mik cans to the point the springs were flat
every can was packed full of smelt
we would spend he next day or so cleaning them'your hands would hurt from the scissors long before you were finished
but well worth every agonizing moment of cleaning was the wonderous reward of eating them (we need a drool smiley )
havent heard of a smelt run in years,i think they may be coming back slightly now
i did see them for sale in the grocery store last year,but a real limited supply and $$$$ for them also
tsalagi next time you see them selling them as bait,buy same and take them home and deep fry them ;)
fins and all,they were my favorite part.nice and crunchy ;D
-
Just be sure that they are fresh bait!! My Buddies Mother came down to the Virgin Islands one time, and went through his freezer, and thawed out some mackerel, and broiled it, and then told him it tasted kinda off. He told her she just ate his marlin bait, that was preserved with formaldehyde! :P Mike, I bet da mighty Mac is a fun drive in a nice wind! :o I would think there would be some little peaks in the seats of the cars that drove across it! ::) ;D ;D I know I would be chewing a hole in my truck seat, if that thing was swaying !
Wayne
-
Wayne ...the Mac is really fun on a Hot day...on a Motorcycle...because as the Temperature climbs so do the Winds...and the Bridge is made of grating ...not Asphalt or Concrete...so You can feel it swaying...and you can see through all the Waaaaay down to the Water below!!
[attachment deleted by admin]
-
scott are those first 2 "TOTAL"suspension bridges like the Mac?
i was always told(and read in their brochures from the bridge) that the Mac
was the largest total suspension bridge,bu that was 25rys ago that i was there :-\
-
El D, that must be fun on a motorcycle, during the winter, when there is ice on the grating! :o
Wayne
-
Wayne the last time I looked...there weren't any studded tires for a Harley....not too many people....Yooper included....that ride Shooters in Da Snow...Ey
-
Wayne the last time I looked...there weren't any studded tires for a Harley....not too many people....Yooper included....that ride Shooters in Da Snow...Ey
theres a harley rider in the small town my cousin owns a bar in,it s about 85 miles north of me in minnesota.
my cousin told me this guy rides his harley EVERY day of the year thru town and back home.
its about a 5 mile trip.
-
Tim....When I lived in Marquette...I had a 1964 650 Bonnie...and thats all I had...so I drove it Rain ...Shine or Snow too...What I did was took small 3/16" Sheetmetal Screws and threaded them into the Tread on the front and back Tires for added Traction...worked sort of like Studs...had to replace them quite a bit though...they would come out...people thought I was nuts...especially after I broke my ankle...and would still ride with the Walking Cast on...and wrapped up in a Towel stuffed in a Bunny Bread Wrapper.....to keep it warm and dry.... ;D We also used to race our Dirt Bikes on the Ice Rinks too...I am sure that they still do it back Home....they used to turn every Softball Field into an Ice Rink every Winter for the Public...well Hurley Field in South Marquette...We used to have Roundy-Round Races every other week on it with Dirt Bikes...that was way cool...almost as fun as racing Snowmobiles on Lake Superior in the Summer.......... :P
-
mike, when was the last time you went to the submarine races at Happy Rock?
piper
(you've gotta be a real Yooper to get this one)
-
Mike; When I moved to Colorodo in '77, the guy I worked with had a Norton 850 Commando and I had my Triumph Bonnie. We did the screw thing after ordering knobbie tires and raced Pikes Peak that year. It was cool to just do it. They let the Limey bikes go first before they cut loose all the rice burnners.
-
mike, when was the last time you went to the submarine races at Happy Rock?
piper
(you've gotta be a real Yooper to get this one)
Well Keith...I used to go out and park and watch the Submarine races back Home...but never went to Gladstone (Happy Rock) to "DO IT"........... >:D....used to just go out by Suicide Hill...or the dead River Basin and I'd watch em...... ;)
For those that haven't figured it out yet.....you will..... ;D
-
that was some kinda funny! lol
pete, agreed. humidity sucks. :(