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eww. relationship thread..
aero86:
yeah, i know it sucks, but im stuck. heres the cliff notes.
been with a really great girl for almost 2 years now. pretty much my perfect girl. tall redhead. great with my kids. ive been divorced for 4 years in october. i have custody of my children. i havent much thought about marriage, but i think its fair for her for us to discuss the future. 2 things, and i want you guys to tell me if im crazy.
id like for her to quit smoking before i think of getting engaged.
she wants kids, i have 2. would you guys think it would be crazy of me to let her go if i dont want anymore? it wouldnt be fair for her not to have her own, just because im done.
Hillbilly:
What if she demanded for you to stop making bows or something else? Relationships based on one person dictating what the other one can and cannot do don't usually work. If the smoking bothers you, find a non-smoker, don't go trying to make someone else into someone they're not just because you want them to be different than they are. That's not a relationship, that's a conditional dictatorship. And all it'll do is breed resentment.
aero86:
im not demanding she change. im just saying if asking someone to quit smoking before id be engaged would be too much to ask. i know its hard to do, i did it myself and it would be for her health
cracker:
If you ain't happy with her the way she is move on. I say this from 25 years of hard won experience. Sorry just telling it like it is.
Justin Snyder:
Tell her how you feel and ask her to quit because you want her to be healthier. Don't add strings or rings to the equation. If she wants to quit because she loves you that is great, otherwise it is extortion.
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