I'm real sorry Lane.  There is nothing like the love a good dog has for you.  I lost one that was truly my best friend about fifteen years ago.  I hung her collar on my gunrack where it still hangs now.  I said I wouldn't put myself through the pain of losing another one, so I didn't have a dog for years.  My wife bought herself a dog, which instantly bonded with me and now LIFE IS GOOD AGAIN.  I have a new little friend (actually 3!) and it is worth risking the pain.    Don't put it off.  Get you another one soon.  We got rescue shelter dogs and I swear nothing loves you like a dog whose life you save.